Biltmore Country Club An Honest Review

An Honest Review Of The Biltmore Country Club — Is It Worth It?

My family and I live in North Barrington, IL, in the Biltmore neighborhood – named as such because the Biltmore Country Club and golf course are right down the street. We moved here six years ago because of the lake resort feel of the area. Mature trees, narrow, curvy, hilly roads, and the homes are not your typical cookie-cutter build in the suburbs.

Honey Lake is a few blocks from our home, and on that lake sits the Biltmore Country Club. Every morning, I walk by the private country club, and it reminds me of Kellerman’s Resort from Dirty Dancing.

Since moving to Barrington, IL, The Boy (my husband) has wanted nothing more than to fish on Honey Lake, but the Biltmore golf course is a private club with beach access, and it has slowly bought up most of the lake rights from homes sitting on the lake. You can look at the water, but no touchy unless you are a Biltmore member. Whomp whomp.

During 2020’s stay-at-home orders, we discussed putting a pool in the backyard, buying a lake house (think murder shack in the woods that I can jazz up), or getting a golf membership at the Biltmore Country Club. Being the non-golfer that I am, I, of course, was all in on the pool idea, but The Boy and my kiddos wore me down.

Many of our friends were members of Biltmore, and the kids’ friends’ parents had golf memberships as well. I gave up my dreams of a pool and applied to become a full-fledged social member of the Biltmore Country Club. Rounds of golf were not in my future, but access to the beach was suddenly possible.

Touring The Biltmore Country Club And Golf Course Before Applying For Membership

We toured the grounds, and I thought, okay, the kids will love this. They can hang out at the Biltmore beach club and the pool; their friends are here, plus The Boy will finally get to fish Honey Lake. The staff was extremely friendly, and while touring the greens, the gentlemen golfing were welcoming – notice how I say the men were nice? Ya, we’ll get to that. Anyhoo, they kept saying, “You’re going to love it here!” Okay, maybe this weird artsy girl is private membership country club material. My takeaway was the people here are not as intimidating as I thought they would be.

Throughout my childhood, I had a few memorable moments of rejection. In elementary school, I was BFFs with Jenny Z – that is until Jenny S. moved to town. In 4th grade, the 2 Jennys passed me a note before recess, “3 is a crowd, and you can’t play with us anymore”. I was crushed and felt like an outsider.

Kyla, what on earth does this have to do with Biltmore Country Club? Well, putting myself out there is…a lot…to say the least. Ever since the Jenny debacle, I’ve protected myself from rejection. For me, it’s a lot of courage. A lot of bravery. A lot of insecurities that bubble up. 

The marketing director at Biltmore Country Club, Laura Doherty, told us that not everyone who applies at the Biltmore golf course is accepted, but that was a rarity. She said, “As long as you aren’t horrible people, you shouldn’t have to worry about that being an issue.” But, of course, handing over that application for membership took me right back to the 4th grade. Am I good enough for the Biltmore Country Club?

My two sponsors, who have golf memberships, told me not to worry. For the most part, we don’t make a ruckus. Yes, I was outspoken as an advocate to legalize golf carts in the Biltmore neighborhood, and I may have been a bit vocal here and there over the whole just wear the stupid mask and quit complaining issue. But otherwise, I’m the weird artsy chick who writes a blog and posts photos of her home on the internet.

Applying for Membership At Biltmore Country Club In Barrington, IL

We applied for membership at Biltmore Country Club in May and were added to the waitlist. See, a few months prior, Biltmore Country Club ran a special offer—a discount for both the social and golf memberships which cut the initiation fee in half. Everyone who didn’t want to pay the full price jumped on that special discount. Social memberships at Biltmore Country Club were at full capacity. We waited patiently for 8 months while the kids asked, “Did you hear back from Biltmore?”

The wait ended on November 24. An email notified all private members that a new applicant was under review. It was us. The kids were over the moon, The Boy had dreams of fish swimming in his head, and my nerves about rejection were at an all-time high. During the application process for the Biltmore Country Club, an email goes out to the members asking for board guidance. The board then votes on acceptance. 

BTDubs, Biltmore Country Club members cannot share private club communications. For the record, my sponsors did not send this email to me, so don’t get your undies in a bundle. This was sent by a friend who had no idea I had applied. 

A few days before the 15-day review period was up, I was invited to the Biltmore Country Club Ladies Luncheon – if you missed it, this is what I wore – scroll down to the bottom. Maybe it was the shoes that did us in? They did catch some attention…anyhoo, I digress. Quite a few ladies told me they were excited to learn about our membership application. I half-jokingly replied, “Well, they told us nothing is guaranteed. I hope we didn’t piss anyone off. My kids and The Boy would be devastated.” They told me to stop being silly and that no one ever gets rejected.

After the membership review period, the board votes. But it was Christmas. Would the board meet before the holidays? Three days after Christmas, there was a knock at the door. FedEx delivered an envelope, and low and behold, it was from Biltmore Country Club! This was it! Merry Christmas to us! My parents, the kids, and I all gathered around the kitchen island while The Boy read the shocking letter of rejection. The board chose not to accept us and returned all of our money – except the $600 application fee.

Letter Of Rejection Of Membership – Biltmore Country Club

Dumbfounded doesn’t even describe the emotion felt. I texted the letter to a few friends, and they were just as flabbergasted. One of us had pissed off a member but, instead of talking to us directly, went to the board of directors and said, “The Herbes can’t sit with us.”

For the record, this review caused quite a kerfuffle in Barrington. The only other applicant rejected in recent years was the ex-husband of a woman whose father previously sat on Biltmore’s board of directors. To get rejected, the level of pissed-offed-ed-ness is messy divorce level.

We are active in our community. The Boy has coached the neighborhood kids in soccer. I’m president of the Biltmore moms group, a founding member of the Barrington Women in Business group, advocate for local businesses, and even owned a shop in downtown Barrington before Covid.

I write a successful blog, and I’ve been featured in Architectural Digest, Fast Company, House Beautiful, and was even featured in the local online publication 365 Barrington. I’m a Better Homes & Garden Style Maker, appeared on BravoTV. Most recently, I filmed a commercial for Walmart. I’ve spoken on the same stage as Nate Berkus and even Gary freaking Vaynerchuk. I’m a homebody, stay outta people’s business, and keep to myself. Seriously, Biltmore Country Club, what more do you want from me? How am I not good enough for you?

After the fog of what the eff just happened wore off, anger set in. Biltmore, you made my kids cry. You hurt my husband. You made me feel inadequate. Positive feedback be damned. Your course profile is about to become slightly tainted because I’m going to write an honest review of my personal experience at your private club.

Biltmore Country Club’s Response To Inquiries

Looking for clarity, The Boy called Laura, Biltmore’s marketing director, but she sent us straight to voicemail. He had a job change since we initially filled out the application back in May. Maybe that discrepancy in our application was the issue? We decided to write an email of inquiry to the board members asking if they could shed some light on the decision. Not knowing the reason for rejection was eating at us. This was the board’s response to our membership rejection.Tommy Nassif sits on the board of directors and is the President/Director of Biltmore Country Club, Barrington, IL

This is how I picture Tommy.

All the feelings from 4th grade rushed over me. Board member Tommy Nassif was my new Jenny. But after thinking about everything that transpired, I asked myself, “Kyla, do you really want to belong to a club that doesn’t want you?” No. No, I don’t. Those people are not my people. Am I sad The Boy and my son can’t fish a lake in my neighborhood, blocks from my home unless invited by a member? Of course, but they’ll get over that. Can I put that returned check towards a pool in my backyard and build a mini private country club in my backyard? Yes. Yes, I can. Only I can allow someone to make me feel unworthy.

And this goes out to anyone who has ever been rejected by a Jenny, a Tommy, a county club, a sorority, heck, even a bowling league. Do not allow anyone to make you feel like less of a person. Be your own unique self. That is what makes you, you. You are awesome, and you can always sit with me, and we can let our freak flags shine together.

This was a difficult lesson to learn, but mark my words; if it was something I said (and I have a couple of thoughts on that; see the update below), I will continue to speak my mind. And I will never try to impress someone just to be accepted. Find your people and embrace them. To all the folks who responded to my texts yesterday, you know who you are. Thank you. Thank you for being my friend. Thank you for your kindness and for offering your help. Thank you for taking time out of your day to listen to me. Thank you for being you. You’ll forever be welcome in my backyard club. I love you.