Do You Drive Your Partner Bonkers?

I’ve now been unemployed for six months. Six months of not commuting into the city. Six months of being in the the house with The Boy. Not sure if you know this, but he works from home…so that means we are in each others face 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. For the most part we get along very well, but there’s always that little something your partner does that drives you bat shit loon balls.



The Boy drums…all the time. During dinner. On the phone. While driving. Even when he’s completely still and silent, he’s drumming in his head. I let it go for a bit, silently hoping and praying it will stop, but after a 7 minute and 58 second drumming sesh, I place my hand on his fingers. While sitting on the sofa watching Stranger Things, he’ll have his arm draped over the back and there’s his fingers tap, tap, tapping away behind my head. I give him “the look”. You know the one I’m talking about. Immediately he realizes he’s playing a game of underlying torture on my brain.

While writing this post, I only thought it fair to ask The Boy what I do that drives him bonkers. Without hesitation, he said the “little piles of shit”. I apparently make little piles of insignificant shit and leave said piles around the house. Unimportant stacks of mail on the kitchen island. Sample work I brought to a meeting that are no longer important. The change out of a purse and its insignificant contents…piled with a hat and mittens because it was “warm” outside after returning from my meeting for which I brought very important papers that turned into insignificant piles of shit upon my return.

Me: “Huh, I didn’t notice I did that.”
The Boy: “That’s because I always clean it up…wait, this this bloggery fodder?”
Me: “Yup.”


Over the course of 12 years, he did break me of a bad habit…or more like trained me…or maybe I trained him. See, I used to always run late…I was even late for our first date. He’s Type A and German, and my tardiness used to make him break out in a cold sweat. Anxiety kicked in forcing him to tap out the most epic drum solo while I methodically brushed on mascara.


Now, after 10 years of marriage, I’m repetitively asked throughout the day, “If we have to be [insert destination here] at 6pm, how long will it take you to get ready?” While I’m getting ready, I’m told, “I’m not rushing you, but just so you know, it’s 4:58pm. We need to leave here in 37 minutes.” During the course of the remaining 37 minutes, he will walk back into the bathroom to casually spray cologne on his shirt or grab shoes from the closet and will ever so subtly continue the countdown.” In 12 minutes, I’m going to pick up the babysitter.” These days, I’m rarely late and more often than not, 10 minutes early.


Although he may hate my little piles of shit and his drumming vibrates my head, at the end of the day…if it wasn’t there…I think we’d oddly miss it. Maybe a mutual acceptance and understanding of quirks is what makes a marriage work. Weird huh? He may drive me bananas on occasion, but it’s the quirks that oddly make me love him even more.

So what about you? Are there little things that drive your partner insane? What drives you bonkers?



  1. Patrick Weseman January 15, 2018

    There are many little things I do that drive my partner crazy and she does also. One is my Rambo shopping in the grocery store and all stores. I try to be in and out as fast as I can. She believes that shopping is an Olympic Sport and will be there forever. I guess that applies all shopping. The other day we were at Home Depot needing to buy a new shower head, she had a look and compare each one. Me on the other hand knew the parameters of what we needed and found it and wanted to get out there most quick. Not so fast sport fans, we were there for 45 more minutes comparing.

    That is the reason I buy my clothes without her help. LOL.

  2. Mary January 15, 2018

    My husband doesn’t wash his hands. And insists on eating in his chair in front of the tv.
    If I don’t stay on top of it, every surface will feel like we have a toddler in the house.
    He also can’t turn off a light when he leaves a room. Apparently it annoys him when I’ve turned it off & he has to turn it back on when he returns.
    I could go on & on with all the things he does. I’ll stop here before I get myself worked up.
    My constant changes to our decor bug him. But that’s perfectly normal, right? Lol

  3. kddomingue January 16, 2018

    Lol! We other leave little piles of shit everywhere! His bug me and mine bug him. I used to be late pretty consistently as I seem to have no concept of the passage of time. He is one of those people who thinks that if you’re 15 minutes early then you’re actually 15 minutes late. We’ve each adjusted our “clocks” over the years. Now we’re very rarely late and often only a few minutes early. He can’t remember where he puts things down at and loses a lot of time lol!ING for the thing he ” just had ” in his hand a minute ago. I rearrange things on a regular basis as I nsearch for the optimal organizational brass Ring so he constantly has to ask where I’ve moved the whatsit THIS time. Lol! We’ve been married almost 40 years!

  4. Jennifer January 21, 2018

    Is The Boy available for hire to clean up all my little piles? 😉

  5. Olivia January 22, 2018

    Oh the time thing… it’s a mutual drive each other crazy. He has no idea why we need to be on time, and I don’t understand the blatant disregard for time. And then the piles are mutual thing too. We both have them, but different contents. “Why do you leave that there?” We both say it, and neither of us have an answer!

  6. Kelsey February 22, 2018

    LOL this post is the best. Apparently I whistle ALL.THE.TIME! I don’t even notice. Lol. I whistle subtly under my breath and I am seriously oblivious to it. He is a slightly reformed slob that uses about 10 drinking glasses per day and leaves them about the house. He doesn’t ever replace toilet paper rolls and drinks all but a teeny dribble of coffee which he “kindly” leaves for me. HA. These make me anxious just writing them all out!!


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