Self Care & Coming Up For Air

Self care — it’s one of the last things on my mind. In fact, I’m struggling to even think of what my needs might be. The hustle of unemployment, being a mom and wife, the holidays, and all the noise from the media…well, let’s just say life has taken my quiet time to an all time low.

A list of ideas for self care.

This last week, I’ve especially felt like I was drowning. Every time I pick up my phone, there seems to be an email or phone call or request that cannot be ignored. At night it’s mommy, I need this. Mommy, watch me dance. Mommy, watch Moana for the 486th time with me. All I want to do is come up for air and breath.



But now. Today. I’m going to write down a list. A physical list of what I want to do for myself. Ideas to carve out an hour or two a week that’s just “me time”. Time to relax, breath, and just be. I mean, how many times have you had some free time and just picked up your phone? That needs to stop. Let’s get creative…wanna make a list with me?

Walking. When I first became unemployed, I’d go for walks around the neighborhood. It was also something I did when I was working at the ad agency.During lunch, I’d just walk out the door with no particular path or destination. No music. No phone. Quiet. Exploring my surroundings.

Floating. Have you heard of this? Basiccally you’re removing all sensory input while immersed in a pool of Epsom salts. I suffer from anxiety and depression, and I’m hoping this helps calm my brain. Much like acupuncture did. There was a Groupon for floats down the street from my house, and The Boy bought me one. I’m stoked to use it. Must make an appointment.

Pedicure or manicure. And no, that doesn’t mean I have to go out and drop a handful of cash at the salon. There’s plenty of polish and lotions in my vanity, so why not put them to good use. It’s been over a year since I got out my favorite — Lincoln Park In The Dark polish. And if the mood is right, I just might slip into a nice hot bath and put a face mask on. I might as well dream big with this self care list, am I right?

Pilates or yoga. Bloggery hustle has me sitting at my computer…a lot. I miss my workouts. Remember when I was going to dig into that morning routine? Epic fail. But, that doesn’t mean I can’t try again, right? My sister-in-law is the genius behind Run Lift RD and has offered to help me out. Healthy lifestyle changes will be a challenge; however, I’m bound and determined to  incorporate them into my daily schedule. There’s a CycleBar that just opened down the street that I’ve been wanting to check out. It’s that introvert hermit mentality that I need to overcome. I find it difficult to do activities on my own. Do you have any motivational tips for me? What makes you want to workout? How do you commit?

Reflecting. The days fly by…faster and faster every year. I want to tune out and reflect on my experiences. Whether it’s drawing or writing or taking photos, I want that creative release and to remember those sweet everyday moments.

Resting. No, I don’t mean sleeping. Remember when I wrote about acupuncture? That was my time, once a week, where I would lay down and rest. Granted it was resting with a bunch of needles in my body, but it was also 50 minutes of silence. No phone. No computer. No chatter. No worries. I would concentrate on my breathing. Breathing in for 7 seconds. Hold it. Slowly exhale. My mind would calm.

Reading. Remember the HOH Book Club? I miss it. Rather then pinning myself to sleep or looking for the next estate sale to hit while lying in bed, I’m going to pick up a book. I have a few sitting on my nightstand just begging to be cracked open. I’ve been meaning to crack The Couple Next Door, but it’s just been sitting there. I’m starting tonight.

Did you add other ideas? I’d love to hear them. Write me in the comments below.


Kyla Herbes


  1. Ronee Bergman November 30, 2017

    Meditation incorporates a lot of the individual things you’ve mentioned. You might want to give it a try…the kids might even like it. Oh wait, that defeats the purpose, lol.

  2. Mary November 30, 2017

    I workout 5 times a week. And the best thing for me was joining a gym that offered group classes in the morning. I’ve gotten to know everyone there & it’s fun. We all support each other.
    I can’t be trusted to work out on my own. So group classes push me to keep going.
    I was nervous when I went to the first class but everyone is so nice. I looked forward to going after that.

  3. Patrick Weseman November 30, 2017

    Walking is a big one for me, also watching TV shows where I don’t have to think. Something like “Million Dollar Listing, Los Angeles.” I can just sit there and go into a zombie-like state and become plant life.

    • kyla December 31, 2017

      OMG! I LOVE Million Dollar Listing! I think Madison is my favorite dude ever!

  4. Julia@Cuckoo4Design December 7, 2017

    I’m so with you on this. You have no idea. My husband and I had such a fight the other day because I asked hime to pick up our daughter from soccer and guess what his text response was?!?! “I’d prefer not too” Can you imaging how my blood was boiling and rising. He is actually getting an Etsy shirt with that saying on it for Christmas now. It’s become a movement. I told him that 80% of my life consists of I’dprefernottos. WTF! So I’ve been trying really hard to give myself a break and go for massages or just do something for me that I actually don’t have time or money for. Some of the things might not get done this holiday season and the reason will be I just preferred not to do them LOL.
    That said I fell down the stairs this week and our kitchen floor flooded. There just really isn’t any time to rest but I will really try to carve out that me time 😉

    • kyla December 31, 2017

      I’m finally catching up! Girl, I hope you got yourself some me time!

  5. Carol December 7, 2017

    A little word of encouragement to all of you in this hard, hard, child rearing season. It gets better! Persevere, find your me time…put it on your calendar, set an alarm, .you need it! A wise friend gave me life changing advise I want to share with you. Write on a note card all the things you love about your spouse, your children, your life. Think back…there are character traits you do love! Look at it daily, dwell on it. Don’t take yourself too seriously, we don’t have all the answers. Ask yourself, have I been fun to live with today?

    • kyla December 31, 2017

      I’m going to take your advice! Setting an alarm for sure. And I really like the idea of asking yourself have I been fun to live with today. THANK YOU!

  6. Melissa Lane December 9, 2017

    Kyla – yes go float! It will check off a lot of what you’re looking for – resting, reflection, relaxation for your computer body. Some call it accelerated meditation, and I agree. Two things that helped me when I started doing it: I was fidgety until I put my arms above my head (horizontally speaking) instead of by my sides, and, because settling in is the hardest part, I found that 90-minute sessions made the most sense. Oh – also, don’t shave right before going. The salt will sting. Call me after you go! I’d love to hear what you think. XOM


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